Spanish Cultural Differences from Americans

"Culture Shock" is the term used to explain how people feel when they experience differences in the new culture they live in versus the culture they grew up in. Cultural differences are not good or bad-- they are just differences in what is 'normal' in a culture or society. Even in America, we experience different cultural norms when we joke about how people in the Midwest eat corn and beef every day, whereas people in the Southwest eat spicy Mexican dishes, and people in the South eat mostly fried comfort food. In some parts of the country, people say 'soda,' and in other areas it is 'pop'. So of course you can imagine that Americans experience some culture shock when they move to Southern Spain. If you know what to expect, the differences will make more sense and you will be better able to handle them. The following 20 differences are listed in my book as the main differences Americans notice in Spain(not necessarily in order of importance):

1.      The lifestyle is very relaxed. Some Americans love this, but for most it is a change from our always-busy American lives. The Spanish take the time to enjoy life: they enjoy long, slow meals, they enjoy family time, they enjoy going for walks with their children. The flip side of this is that timeliness is not a Spanish trait. Stores and restaurants do not open promptly on the hour. Orders and repairs do not always happen on a prompt timeline. Guests often arrive 15 minutes after an announced time.

2.      Family comes first. The Spanish are extremely family-oriented, often being born, growing up, and getting married in the same town. The younger generations take care of the older generations (or hire someone to care for them). Men are involved in family life, taking their children to the park and carrying them in public. Most holidays are celebrated with the entire extended family, in large gatherings with plenty of alcohol, music, and laughter. On Sundays, most stores are closed, because the Spanish spend the whole day with their families.

3.      Work comes second. The Spanish work for a living, but do not live for working. The work ethic is very laid back, and family or fiestas can take precedence to work. Spain can be an extremely relaxing environment for Americans who are used to the constant rush and stress of the States. However, the mañana (tomorrow) attitude of procrastinating can also be very frustrating for people who are waiting for a store to open, for a vehicle to be repaired, or for a landlord to mend something in the home. Things do not always happen in a timely manner, and usually take longer than estimated. The laid back work attitude has also contributed to the economic crisis that has gripped the country for the last few years. Unemployment is currently around 25%, so those who have jobs are very interested in keeping them.

4.      Life is a party. Or more accurately, one fiesta after another. There is almost always some kind of upcoming celebration to anticipate, whether it is one of the major annual events like Carnaval or Feria, a smaller local celebration like Andalusia Day, or a religious or culinary festival celebrated only in one town. Each town has their own schedule of fiestas, but they last most of the year, especially through the warmer weather from Easter until October. The Spanish take holidays and religious festivals seriously, so stores will be closed and people will be out in the streets for a parade or a fair near the town center. Americans usually have a 3-day weekend for holidays like Martin Luther King Day or President’s Day, observing the holiday on the closest Monday. The Spanish celebrate holy days on the calendar date, even if it is a Wednesday or Thursday. So it can be difficult to keep track of all the holidays and business closings. But it is also fun to get out and enjoy some unique celebrations! Look for the holiday schedule at www.aytorota.es. It is explained in depth later in this chapter.

5.      Restaurants are never open when you are hungry. Because the Spanish eat at such different times than Americans, it is difficult to find a place serving food around Noon or 6  pm. Restaurants don’t open for lunch until 1 pm, then close at 4, and don’t reopen until 8 pm! So you have to plan carefully, and maybe get a babysitter to go out for dinner.

6.      Meals are leisurely. It is completely normal to spend 2-3 hours at a restaurant for a meal. Eating in a rush is an American trait. So the first few times you go out, you will probably be appalled at the lack of service and the difficulty in locating a waiter. It isn’t bad service, it’s just different standards. In America, we expect a waiter to check on the table frequently. In Spain, that is considered almost rude. Instead the priority is to leave the guest alone to relax and enjoy their meal. If you want something, including the check, make eye contact or wave your waiter over.

7.      Alcohol is always available. Most Spanish drink frequently, and sometimes profusely. Beer and wine are available at every single public event, whether it is a sporting competition, a religious festival, or even a performance at your child’s school. The legal drinking age is 18. Beer, wine, and sangria are the most common beverages, although hard liquor and mixed drinks are sold at all bars and similar establishments. The drunk driving limit is much lower in Spain: only 0.01 blood alcohol is permitted while driving a vehicle. So if you have even one drink in town, it is best to catch a ride with a taxi or friend, or have plans to walk home, rather than taking the risk of driving.

8.      The Spanish adore children. If you have children, you will find it common for them to be greeted, touched, and cooed over in the streets with cries of ‘Que guapo/guapa!’ (how cute!). Children are included in all festivals and celebrations, even those occurring in the middle of the night. Many large stores and shopping centers have play areas where children can be dropped off while you shop, or play while you eat. In restaurants and other public settings, children are often seen AND heard, unless it is a formal event.

At the San Lucar horse race, children climb all over the starting gate in between races!

9.      Parking garages don’t have cashiers at the exits. To avoid getting trapped at the exit gate, make sure you pay your ticket at the machine—la cajero—BEFORE you get into your car. The machines are usually located in stairways or near the exit. You pay while on foot, the machine validates your ticket, and then you have about 10 minutes to get in your car and drive out. Swipe the validated ticket at the exit, and the gate will raise automatically.

10.   Spain is a Catholic country. Ever since the conquest of the Christian king and queen in the 15^th century, the country has been exclusively Catholic. This means that every small town has its own church or cathedral, and almost all public holidays are rooted in some religious tradition honoring Jesus, Mary, or a saint. Public schools almost always teach Catholic religion as part of the curriculum, because there is no separation of Church and State like there is in America (although parents can opt out of these classes). There are public processions of statues on holy days, and national holidays from work for important Catholic feasts. Not everyone attends church, and you will not find a strict or moralistic Catholic attitude in the culture. Religion is simply part of the Spanish history and mindset. There are very few Protestant groups represented, as Spain endeavored to preserve pure Catholicism with events such as the Inquisition. There is however a growing presence of Islam, mainly in immigrant communities.

11.   Andalusians (people living in Southern Spain) are extremely friendly and welcoming. The Southern United States is famous for its hospitality, and the same seems to be true in Southern Spain. People you barely know will offer to take you places, show you around, and invite you to cultural events. You will be invited to try new foods and drinks. Americans are sometimes surprised by this generosity and openness, and our natural reaction may be to decline the invitation and walk away quickly. Of course, use common sense and never go anywhere alone or with someone who makes you uncomfortable. But don’t pass up great opportunities simply because they are offered with great zeal.

12.   The sun stays up forever in the summer! Spain is in the wrong time zone. Currently, Spain is in the GMT+1 time zone, meaning it is in the same time zone as Italy and most of the Mediterranean—6 hours ahead of the East Coast of the United States. However, geographically, Spain is actually WEST of London. The time was changed during World War II, when dictator Francisco Franco sought to align Spain with the Nazis in Germany and Italy. It was never changed back. So in summer, the sun doesn’t set until after 10pm.

13.   Daylight Savings Time is still observed in Spain—spring forward one hour in March, fall back one hour in October. However, it is observed on a different date here than in America, usually a few weeks apart, so for a few weeks your family and friends in the States will be on a slightly different time than you.

14.   The “first floor” is upstairs. In Spain, as in most of Europe, what we call the first floor is referred to as the ground floor, planta baja. When you walk upstairs to what they call the first floor—primer piso—you are on what Americans typically call the 2nd floor. So if you’re looking for an office or apartment on the first floor, remember you’ll have to go upstairs.

15.   You will see a lot of skin. The Spanish concept of modesty is different from Americans. So, for example, all beaches in the area are topless beaches. It doesn’t matter if women are young or old, thin or fat—they frequently go topless at the beach. The bottoms that are worn are usually thongs. Men typically wear tight bathing suits with a short cut, whether they are young or old. And young children are often completely naked, up until age 8.

16.   Gender equality has not quite developed. While there are now more women in the workforce than in previous generations, household attitudes towards men’s and women’s roles have not changed much in the past hundred years. Cooking and cleaning are still almost exclusively women’s work, as are most child-related tasks. Athleticism is a male-dominated field, but women are now becoming more involved in sporting events.

17.   Europeans are much more energy-conscious than Americans. Spain makes excellent use of wind and solar power, yet energy costs are still much higher than in the States. Therefore, the Spanish are much better at conserving energy: central heat and air conditioning are not standard, many homes don’t use dryers, and hot water is not always available for showers. You can open or close windows and blinds to control temperature, and you should unplug anything not in use. Recycling is common, but not mandatory, in most places off base.

18.   Spanish plumbing is different. You will notice toilets are slightly different in a few ways. They use less water, so you will usually have an option to press one button for a partial flush (for liquids only) or a different button for a complete flush (for solids). In many public restrooms, it is typical to place toilet paper in a trash can instead of flushing it. Finally, many European toilets are designed with straight pipes instead of s-shaped pipes, so it can be common for sewage smells to come back out through toilets, sinks, or showers. This is a problem both on base and in town. Keep drains plugged when not in use.

19.   Gardens are important. Even the smallest house or apartment will have flowers hanging on the walls, crammed onto tiny balconies, and growing in a narrow courtyard. The Spanish take a lot of pride in their homes and their gardens. There are even town competitions in the summer for the most beautiful patio. Houses and streets are generally neat and clean, so please do your part to keep it that way.

20.   Girls always have pierced ears. The Spanish generally pierce a baby girl’s ears just after birth, while she is still in the hospital. So a child without pierced ears is assumed to be a boy, even if she is dressed all in pink! (And even more interestingly, newborn boys are not usually circumcised, so asking for this at a Spanish hospital is seen as a somewhat cruel request.) If you want to get your daughter’s ears pierced while stationed here, the safest place to go is the local Farmacia (Pharmacy) where they will use a sterile needle. You can also go to Claire’s in El Paseo Mall, but there they will use a punch gun.

After publishing the book, I realized there were several more big differences I have become so used to that I didn't even include them! So I will add them here:

21. The Spanish don't shake hands to greet each other. Instead, they kiss. No, it's not a romantic kiss on the lips. It's more like an air kiss next to each cheek. When greeting a Spainsh person, move your head first to the left, and make a kiss in the air next to their right cheek. They will simultaneously do the same to you. Then, quickly move your head to the right side, and kiss the air next to their left cheek. They will do the same. Then take a step back and continue the conversation. You will see everyone do this-- friends, family members, women greeting women, men greeting men, and even children greeting adults. It is just the standard way to say Hola, and doesn't mean anything romantic. American handshakes are too formal and cold for such a warm culture with little regard for personal space.

22. Spanish last names are different. It's not Mr. And Mrs. Garcia. When a Spanish woman gets married, she does not take her husband's last name. When they have children, the child usually has two last names-- one from their father, and one from their mother. The more important one (usually the father's) is listed first, and that is the one that wil be passed on to their own children. So, for example, if a man named José Alverez Peréz marries a woman named Maria Gonzolez Rodriguez, their children could be called Juan Alverez Gonzolez and Carlotta Alverez Gonzolez. The last name is sometimes hyphenated to show that the first of the last names- the paternal one- is the more important one.

23. Birthdays are not as important as Name Days. Traditionally, most Spanish babies are given Christian names, either after a favorite saint or a family member. The date the child is born is important for determining their age, and is sometimes celebrated by the family. However, the more important celebration is on the child's Name Day, which is the feast day of the saint with that name. For example, my birthday is in January. But my name is Elizabeth. If I were Spanish, my parents would have immediately determined whether I was named after St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, whose feast day is January 4, or after St. Elizabeth of Hungary, whose feast day is November 19... Or after any other saint Elizabeth. Whichever saint was selected, that is the day I would celebrate with cake and presents. However, as the Spanish become more familiar with American customs, it is not uncommon to see actual birth dates celebrated as well.

Mold

One drawback of Spain's climate is that the winters are chilly, damp, and cloudy. These are unfortunately perfect conditions for ... Mold. During the rainy season (November-February), mold can be a problem both on and off base. This doesn't really have anything to do with your cleaning habits. It has more to do with environmental factors like the amount of rain that month, or the ventilation in your home. 

IS MOLD DANGEROUS?

In most cases, it is just a frustrating cleaning obstacle. If left untreated, mold can damage walls, furniture, and any items left in outdoor storage (especially cloth items like strollers, car seats, military gear, or clothing). HOWEVER... Some people, especially children, are sensitive to mold and can become sick from inhaling the spores. If you or a family member experience breathing problems, coughing, or frequent illness, it could be caused by mold in your house. If you have a pre-diagnosed condition like asthma, mold can really affect your health and quality of life.

TYPES OF MOLD AND TREATMENT:

There are several types to watch out for. All can cause damage and sickness, and all should be treated immediately.

MILDEW or BLACK MOLD is mold that appears as small dark spots, usually on cloth or material. In the Bible, Jews were required to throw away material with this mold on it, because there was no way to kill it. Now we know that a mixture of bleach and water can be used to scrub mildew off items like strollers. But bleach will damage clothing, and mildew cannot be washed out in a regular wash cycle, so if you find mildew on regular clothes or laundry, you may still need to throw them away. Mildew will also appear around doors and windows without much sunlight or circulation.

GREEN MOLD is the fuzzy kind that most people are familiar with. It thrives in damp, dark environments, so check the back of couches occasionally, and any containers or boxes that are in outdoor storage areas. It can be wiped off with Clorox wipes, or sprayed with a bleach/water solution.

WHITE MOLD can grow underneath plaster on concrete walls, or even in between tiles in bathrooms. It can be hard to spot on white plaster or white grout, but you will notice areas where the plaster on the walls cracks, peels, or falls off. This can also be treated with a bleach-water solution, but the loose plaster must first be removed, then the whole area should be cleaned with bleach, allowed to dry, and resealed and repainted.

MOLD PREVENTION:

- Sunlight kills mold, so try to open curtains and blinds during the day. 

- dry air prevents mold, so if you live on base, turn on the de-humidifier in your HVAC closet. If you live off base, you can get a de-humidifier from the base Self Help center. In either case, remember to check the de-humidifier tray frequently, and be sure to empty it when it gets full.

- open a window when taking a shower, so the steam moisture won't remain in the bathroom

- keep furniture like beds and couches a few inches off the wall, so the moisture from the plaster won't transfer to your furniture and let mold grow there.

Having a baby while stationed in Spain

When we first moved to Spain, we figured of course we would not want to have a baby here. Give birth in a foreign country? Without any family around to help out? No way! We wanted to have more children, but figured we would wait 3 years until we were back in the States.
My first week here, I met a mom with a newborn. "Wow, did you have him here?" I asked. When she answered yes, I think I stared at her in awe and confusion. "Weren't you nervous?" She just shrugged and said, "Not really. It isn't any different from any other hospital."
After hearing similar stories from other moms for over a year, I realized they were right. The Naval Hospital on base has a limited staff, but the OB-GYN office is great, and the Labor & Delivery floor is also fully covered at all times. So the mere fact of being in another country should not be a big deterrent when planning your family. At least, that was our conclusion when we decided to have our next baby while stationed here, and we ended up with wonderful Mary Catherine!

It's true that the process of giving birth at Naval Station Rota is really the same as any other military hospital (this is my 4th child and 3rd naval hospital). The staff is all American Navy personnel who speak English. You will receive regular pre-natal care, check-ups, vitamins, ultrasounds, etc. The only differences arise if you have a high-risk pregnancy or are carrying multiples. In those cases, the on-base hospital will automatically refer you to a hospital off base for your care because the Spanish hospitals have specialists and equipment to handle those situations. You will have either an English-speaking doctor or a translator. The base Naval Hospital will perform regular scheduled c-sections. However, they will not perform emergency c-sections on women less than 36 weeks along, because there is no NIC-U or breathing equipment to help pre-term babies. So in those rare cases the mom would be rushed to a hospital in town. Rota's hospital is just minutes away. The larger hospitals in Jerez and Cadiz are 20-30 minutes driving.
Currently, the base Naval Hospital delivers an average of 1 baby per week. This means that the patient receives very personalized care and attention! The staff includes 2 OB-GYN doctors, so there is always one on call. There are multiple nurses, corpsmen, and a lactation consultant. Prior to delivering, you will tour the facility. The delivery and recovery rooms are very spacious and comfortable (with room for my whole family to visit !) Plus, after delivering, you receive a complimentary steak and seafood dinner! I had no complaints about the hospital, the staff, or my care, and would recommend it to anyone. (Caveat: I was delivering my 4th child, and all my pregnancies and deliveries have been fairly routine and normal without complications. I think a first-time mom would understandably be a little more nervous, but there are still plenty first-timers who deliver there each year).
Once you have your adorable child, the next challenge is obtaining all their paperwork. You may wonder what citizenship your child receives when born in another country. Well, if both parents are American citizens, then the child is automatically an American citizen, whether they were born on base or in a Spanish hospital. In fact, I don't think you can even attempt to get Spanish citizenship for the baby unless you have 1 parent who already has citizenship, or if the child lives here for more than 10 years. So even though our baby has never been to America, she is an American citizen with a passport, birth certificate, and Social Security number. How did we get them? Well, it's a bit of a process. Thankfully, the hospital staff will walk you through it all before the baby is born, so you know what to expect. But be aware that it can take several months to receive these documents, so your baby will not be able to get on a plane or be included on your taxes until you get the paperwork back.

How to obtain documents for your baby:

If your baby is born in a Spanish hospital, they will receive a Spanish birth certificate, which you will then use to apply for their American certificate. If they are born in the base hospital, you have to take some additional steps.
1. Fill out the paperwork you are given prior to the birth, and complete it when the baby is born. Turn it in at the hospital records office, and they will assist you with completing the Spanish birth questionaire. This takes a few days to process, and when completed you will receive a record of live birth. This is NOT a valid birth certificate.
2. Take the record of live birth, the questionnaire, and the other required documents to the Courthouse in Rota (not in the castle, you will be given an address and directions). Check their opening hours first, because they do close for holidays and siesta. Only 1 parent needs to be present. They will enter your names into the Rota record book, and then print out a Birth Certificate for you on the spot. In fact, you will receive 10 copies, because the only way to get a new certificate is to appear in person. So don't keep them all in one place! We mailed some out to family members for safekeeping, so if we need a copy years from now we don't have to make a trip to Spain! Now you have the baby's Spanish birth certificate. This still won't work for most American transactions without a translation, so now you have to get the American document.
3. The American document is called a Certification of Birth Abroad. This will be your child's birth certificate when applying for schools and any American activities. To apply, paperwork needs to be filed and sent to the American Embassy in Spain. There are several ways to do this.

- Option one: Complete the process on base through PSD (Personnel Support Detachment). You can turn in all your paperwork on base and simultaneously apply for the baby's Certification of Birth Abroad, Passports (Tourist and Official), and Social Security card. It is convenient, but also unfortunately the slowest option because it has to pass through several levels of bureaucracy. It will take several months to receive the documents, and there is no way to predict or track the completion date. The process has undergone several changes in the past year, but unfortunately there are still many reports of documents being lost, misfiled, or delayed. Hopefully the process will improve soon!

- Option two: Take your documents to Seville, where there is an American consulate. Here you can apply for everything at once except the official passport (I believe that can only be done on base through PSD). To use this option, first call the American Consulate to schedule an appointment. (The contact number will be in your pre-birth paperwork). You can't make an appointment until your baby is born, and there is sometimes a wait of a few weeks to get the appointment. They will tell you exactly which documents to bring. Make sure you have photocopies, because you cannot make copies at their office! Also, both parents must be present to apply for the passport! Once you apply, they will send the documents to base, and they usually arrive within 1 month.

- Option three: Go directly to the American consulate in Madrid. This is the fastest, most guaranteed method to get your documents. We had to use this method, because we had family travel plans when the baby was exactly 8 weeks old, so we needed a passport quickly. Yes, we had to bring our entire family to Madrid, since both parents have to be present when applying for a passport. It's about a 7-hour drive, and we just spent one night. We had to make the trip, because when she was born in April they were temporarily not processing any passports on base, and when we called Seville, there were no appointments for 1 month. So we made an appointment at the Madrid Consulate, and brought copies of all our documents. We spent about 2 hours total at the consulate, and thankfully there was an area for kids to play in the waiting room. You will have to pass through metal detectors and cannot bring any phones or computers into the consulate, so don't plan on having those to entertain your kids! We had hoped to walk out of the building with her documents, but that is only the case with an actual EMERGENCY passport, and they are a little strict on handing those out. However, they sent the documents through the company SEUR, and we were able to pick them up in Puerto about 8 days after we went to Madrid. (SEUR is in the industrial area of Madrid, near the Mercadona grocery store, but off to the right under the bridge.) This was plenty of time to give us peace of mind about traveling with our infant!

So, if you follow all those steps, you can get your baby's documents about 6 weeks (or more) after they are born! And then your baby can spend the rest of their life surprising people with the fact that they were born in Spain! :-)

Paris

Paris is one of my favorite places on this Earth. I spent a semester living there for a study-abroad program in college, and the experience was truly life-changing. I knew 6 months would go quickly, so I pushed myself to go/see/do EVERYTHING. As a result, I fell in love with the city, the people, the food, the museums...
Ten years later, I was finally able to return, as a last hurrah trip before I had baby Mary Catherine. It was just my husband and I, without kids. Magical! It was wonderful to return to a city I already knew so well, and share it with my husband, who had never been there. I took him to some of my favorite places, and we even visited my former host family!
Since then, I frequently get questions from Americans traveling to Paris for the first time. They want to know what to do, where to stay, how to save money, and what to eat. In an attempt to share several months worth of experience in one blog post, here is my advice...

WHEN TO GO:

Paris is amazing any time of year. But my favorite time is Spring---the chestnut trees are full of fresh green leaves, the air is warm, and the sunlight is golden. Fall is a close second, with all those leaves changing and so many beautiful afternoons. Summer is quite hot and muggy, and full of tourists. And winter can be very cold, rainy, gray, and dreary. So if you plan a winter trip, try to limit your walking, and plan lots of indoor activities (and be aware that churches aren't usually heated!) If possible, go in April or May.

WHERE TO STAY:
First of all, you need to look at a map of Paris. It is a large city, and the main attractions are somewhat spread out. As with most European towns, the oldest area is in the city center, on the islands in the middle of the River Seine. Paris is divided into Arrondisements, or neighborhoods, that are numbered from 1-20. They begin at the city center, and spiral outward like a snail's shell. Each neighborhood has its own personality and attractions, but you don't need to visit them all. My favorites, and the ones I always recommend to friends, are the 5th (Latin Quarter) and the 6th (St. Germain). These neighborhoods are centrally located, very safe, and easy walking distance to Notre Dame, the Louvre, Luxembourg Gardens, and many other sites. They are also somewhat affordable, since they are the students' district, so there are many simple hotels and apartments to choose from. (We use the sites AirBnB.com or FlipKey.com to reserve apartments when we travel with family, but on our trip we were actually able to stay in a hotel! We found a great deal at the hotel Fontaines de Luxembourg.) The best things about these neighborhoods is that they have a huge variety of cafes and restaurants, representing many different kinds of world cuisines, and many offering casual affordable meals. We had breakfast at a little crepe shop every morning, and the taste of pastry and chocolate still lingers in my dreams. :-)
Why not stay close to the Eiffel Tower or the Arc de Triomphe? In a word, location. Both those sites are on the Western edge of the city, a little removed from the center. If you stay there, you will be doing even more walking to get to other places, and trust me--you will already be doing miles of walking through museums! Also, the neighborhoods around those two attractions are very expensive, and have more stores than restaurants. So my recommendation is to stay near the center, then use a cab, the metro, or the Hop On/Off buses to get over to sites like the Eiffel Tower, Arc de Triomphe, and Montmartre.

LEFT OR RIGHT BANK?
These terms are used to describe the two sides of the River Seine. Facing west, the way the river flows, the Left Bank is the Southern part of Paris-- the artsy neighborhoods of the Latin district, St. Germain, Montparnasse. This is my favorite area--full of cafés, medieval streets, and affordable places to eat and stay. The Right Bank is the Northern side of the city, generally wealthier, fancier, and full of elite shopping districts and beautiful architecture. Sometimes these neighborhoods are considered more quiet and peaceful, while the Left Bank neighborhoods can be noisier and filled with a younger crowd. But honestly, you can find wonderful, romantic, classy areas in any corner of Paris, so this is not a big determining factor when planning your visit.

GETTING AROUND:

Now you need to look at a metro map. Since you are most likely flying into the city, you first need to know how to get from the airport to your lodging. If you use RyanAir, they arrive in the Paris Beauvais airport, which is actually over an hour by bus from the city. But they do offer the shuttle bus to get you there somewhat conveniently. Other airlines fly into Charles de Gaul airport in the northeast, or Orly Airport in the South. In either case, you don't need to get an expensive cab ride into the city. The RER trains are like express metro trains. Each of those airports has an RER stop on the B line (blue), where you can purchase a ticket into the city center. The automated ticket machine will ask you which zones you need a ticket for. The airports are out at the farthest zones, so you need to buy 1 ticket that covers all 5 zones. The RER connects with the metro in multiple locations, so you can seamlessly go from the airport RER, get off at the metro line closest to you lodging, and then ride on the metro probably to within a few blocks of where you are staying. Just be sure to inquire about the closest metro stop before you leave! Once in town, the metro and taxis are an easy way to get around. Most metro stops are in Zone 1, so you can just buy individual tickets (T+) for 1.80 Euro a piece, or a pack of 10 (un carnet) for 14 Euros. Be forewarned that the metro is not very stroller friendly. Most stops have quite a few stairs to get underground. There is usually an elevator from street level, but you need to push the button and wait for the attendant somewhere in the metro to respond on the loudspeaker and open the doors. Sometimes they simply don't respond, so try to use baby backpacks or a very lightweight stroller.
Oh, and my French family's advice for estimating the time of a metro ride? Calculate 2 minutes for each stop on the map, and 5 minutes each time you change trains at a station. (This is generally true for the Metro, but NOT for the RER, where stops are much farther apart and you often wait much longer for trains!)

DO I NEED A PARIS PASS? There are several tourist package bundles available to you. Some can save you money, but do your research and choose the correct one for your trip. The Paris Museum Pass was great for us, since my husband and I wanted to cram in as many sights as possible during our brief child-free visit. The best part is that the pass not only covers your entrance fee into the major museums, but also lets you skip lines and go straight into places like the Louvre and Arc de Triomphe, saving you valuable time. I highly recommend this one if you are traveling with adults, but with kids it might not be as beneficial because you will probably go to fewer locations each day. The 2-day pass is 42 Euro per adult. Another option is the Paris Visite Pass, which offers unlimited use on the Paris public transportation. Prices vary based on number of days and how many zones you choose. 1 adult's 1-day metro pass for Zone 1 (almost all of touristy Paris, except the airports) is about 12 Euros. Metro tickets purchased individually are about 1.80 Euro per person per ride. A final option is the Paris Pass, which includes all of the above (free museum entrances, no lines, and metro travel), as well as free entrance onto the River Cruise and the Hop On/Off Bus. The two-day adult pass is 117 Euros. Again, this can still be a deal if you do the River Cruise and use the bus, it just depends how much hopping around you do.


WHAT TO SEE:
Ahhhhhh, so much! Certainly way more than you would be able to cover in a weekend or even a week, but let me try to pick my favorites...

Eiffel Tower

Of course, this is the must-see site when you visit Paris! But you have choices how/when you see it. In my opinion, the long lines to go to the top are simply not worth it. I've done it, and the view is wonderful, but you can also get great views from the Arc de Triomphe or Notre Dame Towers without wasting hours in a line. It's wonderful to walk right up to and underneath the tower to see the bones of this interesting ironwork structure that was created for the World Fair in 1889. You also get great views from across the river, at Trocadero. If you want to see it sparkle, be in view during the first 5 minutes of any hour from sunset (8 PM)- 1 AM. The light show is a newer event since the year 2000. If you catch it, it is truly a magical experience, one that you will not forget!
Another amazing Paris experience would be to eat in the gourmet restaurant on the middle levelof the tower. Of course it is expensive, but the food is top-quality and all shaped like the tower. Dinner reservations at the Restaurant Jules Verne also let you skip the lines and get a world-class view. :-)



Arc de Triomphe and Champs Eysées
 This famous Arc was built in the 1800's to honor everyone who died in the French Revolution and the Napoleonic Wars. It is in the center of the Place d'Etoile, which is a 12-lane traffic circle in the Northwest of Paris. The Arc stands at the end of the famous Champs Elysées street, and has a straight view all the way to the Louvre. Climbing to the top gives you amazing views in every direction! You are supposed to cross the street underground through a tunnel, but one of my favorite memories was running through the circle with my husband! (Traffic was stopped for the weekly procession of the French Legionaires to renew the eternal flame at the tomb of the unknown soldier, which is directly below the Arc.) Strolling down the Champs Elysées (which means Elysian Fields) you will see the flagship stores of every luxury brand of clothing, purses, perfume, and accessories. It's like 5th Avenue in New York City, but much classier. You can also find a Movie Theater here that plays movies in English if they are an American film marked VO (Version Original).


 Louvre


 The Louvre Museum is one of the largest museum in the world. The interior corridors contain literally miles of paintings, sculptures, and sketches. When I lived in Paris, I took an art history class where we went to the Louvre once each week, and spent an hour in a different section each time. I'm still not sure I have seen everything there! So... it is honestly way too much to take in during one visit. Most people make the loop to see the top 3 attractions: Mona Lisa (La Jocunde), which is actually really small; Venus de Milo, which is gorgeous, and the Winged Victory/ Nike. If you like Renaissance art, then you will be in heaven here. So many enormous paintings, and a great variety of collections from Egypt, Roman Empire, Medieval Religious art, Napoleonic era decor, and even collections from Spain and Northern Europe. If you go downstairs, you can walk through the Louvre's original Medieval moat. It is exciting to realize that this was originally the palace of the French kings, so the building itself is as interesting and historically important as the art it contains. If you go, decide ahead of time how many hours you have available, and which sections you want to see most. You have to prioritize your visit to save you feet!


Museé d'Orsay
To be honest, I actually prefer this museum over the Louvre. It is the second largest art museum in Paris, but instead of focusing on Renaissance and Medieval art, it focuses on the 1800's styles, especially Impressionism. It also has an amazing sculpture gallery down the center of the museum. There is still a lot here, and you can easily spend a few hours inside, but it's not as overwhelming as the Louvre. And, it has Monet... and Manet... and many other of my favorites. 


Notre Dame Cathedral

This world-renowned church was built from the 1100's-1300's, and is a truly amazing example of French Gothic architecture. The sturdy twin towers in the front are a famous sight, but to really appreciate the building, you need to view it from the garden behind it, or from the river. Then you can see the delicate flying buttresses that hold up the stone structure and make it so unique. Inside, 3 different enormous rose windows will take your breath away. You can go to Mass here in several languages, at different times on Sundays. To visit the towers and the treasury, go when Mass is not in session.
Other churches worth mentioning:
There are over 100 churches in Paris. Literally. Almost all Catholic. A unique church was built in each neighborhood, and many are centuries old. Not all remain places of worship, as some are now used for public events like lectures or concerts. When I lived there, I was studying Theology, so I visited as many as I could and got involved in multiple church events and activities. Some favorites are:
- St. Germain des Pres, which has a Sunday evening Mass and a very active Young Adult group
- Sainte Chapelle, which is a tiny church built to house Jesus's crown of thorns, and has the most brilliant, beautiful stained glass windows in the world! (photo at right)
- Sacré Coeur, the large white church on the top of the hill of Montmartre is a gorgeous 'modern' church, and has perpetual Adoration inside
- The Church of the Miraculous Medal (Notre Dame de la Medaille Miraculeuse) is on Rue du Bac, and Saint Catherine Labouré's body is preserved there.
- Saint Denis, on the Northern edge of the city, houses the tombs of many French kings. It's a little out of the way, but if you stay for a week, very worth a visit to see so many amazing and unique tombs stretching back over centuries.



Seine River
This river cuts through the center of Paris, and is crossed by numerous gorgeous bridges. A river cruise is the best way to take them all in without walking for hours (although I spent plenty of hours as a student strolling along the Seine and browsing through the green bookstands along the Left Bank!) There are a few brands of cruises, mostly leaving from the Eiffel Tower and making a round-trip loop. You can go on a Sightseeing Cruise, or even have dinner on the boat! At sunset, it is an amazing way to see the city, starting at 14 Euro per person.


Lock Bridge (Pont des Arts)
This is a fairly new tradition that has caught on with tourists at several bridges in Paris, and is even mentioned in some movies. Couples who visit the City of Love write their names on a padlock, then lock it onto the bridge, and throw the key into the river. The largest collection is on the Pont des Arts, just upstream (east) of Notre Dame.







Other Museums: Oh, there are hundreds to choose from, so if you have a favorite artist or interest, look them up in advance. They just may have a museum in Paris! Some of my favorites (these are probably not top visits on a weekend trip, but great ideas for a full week):
- Rodin has an indoor/outdoor museum where you can see his amazing sculptures like the Kiss (at left) and the Thinker.
- Monet (Marmottan), in the Western side of the 16th arrondisement has the best collection of Monet's work, from small detailed paintings to giant canvasses that cover an entire wall.
- The Chocolate Museum is relatively new, and presents an interesting history of the development of chocolate, as well as some delicious samples of hot chocolate at the end!
- Moyen Age, museum of the Middle Ages, is really cool because it has the ruins of Roman baths, which are the oldest thing in Paris. It is also known for the Unicorn Tapestries.
- Opera. You can tour the gorgeous Paris Opera House, setting of the fictional book Phantom of the Opera. If you are lucky, you can see a show in this amazing theater!
 -Invalides (pictured at right) is the site of Napoleon's tomb, as well as the military museum. We went here at the request of my military history-loving husband, and discovered that it had tons of displays the kids would have enjoyed--full armor of knights, small battlefield replicas, army uniforms, cannons, etc.







Gardens: Paris has some amazing gardens! In good weather, this is where all of Paris turns out to relax in the sun, play with children, and enjoy each other's company. My favorite is the Jardins de Luxembourg, near the city center. It is elegant, and classically beautiful, with a large pool in the center and statues along the walkways. It is located just behind the Palace of Luxembourg.



Versailles:
Speaking of gardens, we must discuss the Palace of Versailles. This gilded palace of Louis XIV has the most gorgeous, formal gardens in France. Its fountains have amazing sculptures of Greek gods spurting showers of water.  Inside, the palace is a breath-taking display of wealth, power, and opulence. Each room has painted ceiling murals, gold-gilded doors, and original period furniture and decor, which all culminates in the famous Hall of Mirrors. It is truly an amazing place. But... I wouldn't recommend it as a visit unless you have a full week in Paris. Getting to Versailles requires a 1-hour ride on the RER train (you need to purchase a special ticket to get to Zone 5) and some walking through the town of Versailles to reach the palace. Touring the palace will take at least an hour, and the gardens can take at least another hour. So it is a full daytrip, and you have to balance it into your trip priorities.


Montmartre: The 18th Arrondisement is the hill of Montmartre, and the location of the large white Basilica of Sacré Coeur (Sacred Heart). This used to be the artist's district, and you can still sit for a portrait or a caricature sketch in the main square. Now, the neighborhood is mostly filled with tourists, and the areas around it are a little seedy and less desirable, so even though this is a unique destination and popular with tourists, it is not my favorite. To get up the very steep hill, you can walk up some long stairways, or you can take a funicular tram up the hill. You can use a metro ticket for the funicular.

EuroDisney: Located just outside of Paris, this smaller version of Disney World caters to the European continent with multi-lingual characters, and representatives from a variety of movies and stories. Of course this is considered the kid-friendly thing to do in Paris, and I know many families that have enjoyed it. The park is smaller than Disney World and is just a 1-day trip. It looks fun and quaint, but (just my two cents here...) I think it is silly to spend a day in Paris at EuroDisney! We can wait until we are back in the States to consider planning a trip to the real Disney World.

Cooking Class: If you want to have a unique Paris experience, I recommend taking a cooking class! There are many to choose from, ranging from half-day classes that take you through the markets to purchase your ingredients first, to classes that are just 1 hour long and prepare 1 pastry. Some are perfect for couples, others are child-friendly. And many are in English! The best value and least time-consuming class we found was at L'Atelier des Sens.We were excited to find a Saturday evening class where you prepare (and then eat) a 3-course meal. However, we ended up changing our plans and going to a concert by the Parisian Orchestra instead. :-)

WHAT/ WHERE TO EAT:

Anywhere! It's all delicious! Truly, any café or brasserie will have delicious, simple, and usually affordable meals. Some common items that are at every café: Croque Monsieur, which is a grilled cheese sandwich. Croque Madame, which is a grilled cheese sandwich with an egg in the middle. Salad Niçoise, which is a fresh green salad with tuna fish and tomatoes. Plateau de Fromages, which is a platter with 3 different small cheese selections.

A patisserie is a bakery with all the fancy pastries, cakes, and tarts that Paris is famous for. The colorful cookies on the top shelf are Madelaines. They are light and creamy and each color is a different flavor. The chocolate cake is called Opera. All the fruit tarts are delicious. :-) If you just want a simple loaf of bread, a Boulangerie is the kind of bakery that makes bread. A loaf is called un baguette. It's wonderful to stop by a bakery and a cheese shop (fromagerie) and buy the ingredients for a picnic, then go enjoy them in a park. Hemingway called Paris a "Movable Feast," and there is something delicious to eat all the time!
Another cheap alternative for food is a grocery store. Monoprix is a large store like Carrefour or Super Wal-Mart, selling everything from groceries to clothes and accessories. It's an easy one-stop shop if your family needs some basic food or supplies.



If you are looking for traditional main dishes, I have several favorites. Moules Frites are mussels and French fries, pictured at right. The mussels are steamed in white wine, and enjoyed right out of the pot with a plate of fries. Another classic is Soup a l'Onion (French Onion Soup,) which is the perfect thing to warm you up on a cold day. Finally, I love a good French roasted chicken (poulet), which is usually served in a garlic-mustard sauce, with a small green salad on the side. Enjoy your trip, and eat well!



All photos are mine. :-) The black and white ones are from my old camera in 2004.